Pessimism? Maybe. But I think thats the way this fucked up life is...
Went Orchard again today. Really boring!! Nothing much to do if you dont wanna spend money. No wonder catching movies is the Singapore No. 1 hobby. Had quite a long chat with Kenneth. Again, we talked about the topic that had been bothering him. I know it means a lot to him, that's why he is so frustrated by how things have turned out. Just want to tell him just to take my words lightly, dont take them seriously. I sometimes say what I feel in that moment in time. But time changes things and I might change my perspective at a later stage. So I think Kenneth has a choice to view things from his own perspective. I shouldn't try to say things to him that try to impose my own views on him.I guess we can only wish that our Friend becomes more willing to open up to us in the future. But at this point in time, I guess he has no wish to include us in his new world. Everybody wishes for a better life and everybody does this in a different manner. Some people want to announce to the world that life is changing for him/her. Some just want others to start realizing for themselves. There are those who want to leave the past behind as they want a total change. As one grows older, the definition of friendship starts deviating from the initial one. You can no longer expect the same commitment, because when people are more exposed to life, they set different priorities at different points in life. Different people start fitting into the picture and some get eliminated. Some people try their best to cramp everybody into the picture but some people just want to keep a neat picture, eliminating those that dont fit in at that point in time. However, I believe, those eliminated are not forgotten. They will remain at a certain place and shift into the picture again when the current picture no longer suits the time.
Dont feel too upset if you are out of the picture. It happens. You will only become very miserable if you are too bothered. In the past, I had been very emotional about such matters but it is just not worth it too feel so miserable when nobody else understands or cares. Of course, you will feel frustrated at times, I do occassionally, but you gotta think about moving on and just reminiscent on what use to be. Seek comfort in that. Gotta accept the fact that even though a person may be a prority in your life, you might not be his/her prority. I just feel that when you stay true and are always ready to be there to give a helping hand, the friendship will somehow be recovered one day. How long down the road? I dont know but it will somehow. Even if it doesn't happen, you have done your part in trying. Pessimism? Maybe. But I think thats the way this fucked up life is...
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